Daddy Issues??

So I am 19 and dating a 36 year old man. Its not weird to me because I have had some kind of attraction to older men but I never really knew why. Until today. See my dad was an AMAZING dad left his kids for a 27 year old woman when I was 12. He didn't speak to me until I was 16 and he came to visit me when I was 17. But then he left again when I was 18 for another women who was 26 and now at age of 19 my father has had another baby. The hardest put is that he didn't even call to tell me I learned from social media. The first thing I did was ball it up because I don't need an of my friends or family feeling bad for me, but there was one person I had to tell and that was my mystery man. I guess I should give him a name like Doc since he is a doctor. But he was the first person I thought of when I felt this pain that is so unbearable that I can't talk about with no one else not even my closest friends. Is it me?? Do I have daddy issues and have to confine in a man 17 years older than me because I am missing the protection, and love from my own dad and have to get it from a man. Are is it that I am completely heads over hills with Doc that he is the only person who I can tell everything too. Maybe its just the man, the only man I feel connected with besides God. I don't know and I probably won't ever know but the worst my relationship with my dad and family gets the closer I feel to Doc.